XK Evocation - E-Type Restoration Tale

Readers may recall that when the rusting tub of WK lay mortally wounded on my pathway, the professional restorers were at one in their opinion that she had long past the point where an amateur’s best attempts at tender love and care could bring her back to life.

How many E-types are driving around with these hidden panels severely weakened by rust?

I harboured dark thoughts that this was probably shorthand for pop her down to our workshops where we have an available intensive care bed at a price which would send even a BUPA hospital manager reaching for the nearest heart monitor.

I now realize that the real fault lay with their bedside manner. Had they gently suggested that the work might, perhaps, be somewhat beyond the physical capabilities of a 63-year-old man with a chronic shoulder injury, a ‘bad back,’ progressively troublesome onset arthritis who basically lives on a diet of strong coffee, over sweetened tea, and illegally imported Dutch cigars, I might have had second thoughts!

Have you any idea what a hand held spot welding machine weighs! Well, I’ll tell you…. eight and a half Kilos. Now try wielding that to any degree of accuracy while lying on you back on a cold concrete floor with you knees tucked under your chin!

To date I have made three unscheduled visits to my osteopath at £30 a shot, and two visits to the local A and E department with either dust or metal fragments in my eye. A tiny sliver of metal which had fallen from my eye brow, was deftly located and removed with great patience and tenderness by a lovely young lady doctor.

So when it happened yet again, I set off to the hospital with visions that she would yet again have the chance to gaze into my bloodshot, yet lustful eyes. In the event she came into triage and deliberately – I suspect – chose a second patient, a much younger and handsome man who had sustained an obviously painful groin injury while playing football.

In fact she gave me a rather dismissive look and waltzed him off into a cubicle with an enthusiasm I thought rather unseemly for the Her Britannic Majesty’s National Health Service

I learned the hard way. Those Gucci style glasses they sell in superstores as ‘eye protection’ fall well short of the mark. Old fashioned full cover goggles are now de-rigueur.

Exposed inner panels after rust removal, and reconstruction

Reconstruction with new metal wherever feasible

I am learning too, that the totally rebuilding the body-shell of an E-type is not rocket science either. In fact if you take your time and apply ‘ a good coat of thought’ to the removal and replacement of suspect metal and fully understand whether the part in question is an integral part of the structure, or just cosmetic, then the correct decisions can be made without the loss of too much sleep.

A few years back, the XK Club’s tour mechanic Keith Fell and I, set about adjusting the track and camber of my D-type.

We used nothing more technical than a couple of pairs of keen eyes and a 10p ball of string from Woolworths! It drove fine, although a few months ago, after I sold the D to finance the E, the new owner had it tracked up again just to make sure.

He spent more money than it would cost to sink a village well in Somalia, engaging a garage which boasted the very latest laser technology. The result: the tracking and camber were near enough spot on after at least 4 years of hard driving! No adjustment was required!

It was a salutary lesson! I was reminded of this when I asked a highly experienced Jaguar restoration expert to what millimeters of tolerance he rebuilt an E-type. “Millimeters??” he scoffed. “Inches laddie, inches!”

He even suggested that he had never come across an E-type that had two sides which were anything near exactly the same. The car’s width was, according to him, designed to ensure that to actually see both sides at any one time, you have to stand so far back, that Jaguar’s original indiscretions are rendered invisible to the naked eye!

I went off and invested in another ball of string!

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